Monday, May 24, 2010


I'm waiting for life to seem normal again.
Noah has successfully settled into a healthy sleep and feeding cycle that enables me to still do wifely duties around the house. We have established a routine and a schedule that makes life very do-able, if not easy, and yet I still feel like this is temporary. I have been a mother for 18 days, when will I feel like a mother? I feel kind of like a babysitter sometimes. That might explain why I feel so intensively jealous of others when I let them hold Noah, like they might steal him away from me. Or at least steal his affection. I want to be a good mother so badly! Am I doing it right? According to our doctor, Noah and I both get an A+ as far as health goes, and Noah's yucky umbilical cord stump finally fell off. (his belly button is so cute!) Yet, sometimes I feel inadequate to nurture such a perfect baby. I hope this flowing and ebbing tide of feelings of inadequacy is due to the post-baby hormones that everyone warns about. I love my little Noah so much. I'm blessed beyond what I could have ever asked God for. My family is beautiful and healthy. Please, Lord, enable me. Equip me. Help me be the best mother and wife I can be. Ultimately, it's for Your glory, Lord.
Does anyone want a cat?

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